Sunday, December 27, 2009

out of whack, but looking forward to a new year

Warning: I am about to whine. I will try to get it out of the way as quickly and painlessly as possible, but whining it will be. And then, I shall get on to the good stuff.

I have never been so anxious to say good-bye to the month of December as I am this year. Isn't that pathetic?!! I hate that I feel that way...I don't like feeling like such a cranky old grump. :( Usually, December is my favorite time of the year...always hectic, but manageable. This year nothing seemed manageable. The month started with the flu. Totally knocked me out for days...and I usually refuse to let anything stop me. (In fact, it refuses to totally release it's grip on me even now...the chest pain and coughing seem determined to hang on.) Anyway, this set me back immensely on holiday preps. I spent the next few weeks in overdrive. Then last Saturday, we headed to my parents for our annual get-together with some extended family. We left Annie there to spend some time with her grandparents. The next few days I really went crazy, trying to finish up some gifts I was making, finish up the wrapping, cleaning the house, preparing beds, and mostly cooking, cooking, cooking. Because my parents and my brother always come up and spend a few days with us over Christmas. They were due to arrive late Thursday morning. On the verge of collapse Wednesday night, but finally feeling that I had my act together for the following few days, Rich, the boys, and I sat down to watch A Christmas Story. And about halfway through, Rich said, "I feel like my face is on fire. I think I have a fever." Sure enough, 102.8 degrees. Yes, he had somehow managed to come down with the flu. So, I immediately had to call my parents and let them know. We worked it out that they would just drive up in the morning and drop off Annie, and then head back home. So I then spent the next hour or so taking everything out from under the tree and digging out and packing up all the presents for my parents and brother. Spent the next morning, dividing up all the food I'd been making for the past three days so I could send half of it home with them. Spent a good deal of time simply in tears because I was on the verge of exhaustion from being sick for so long and working so hard, just to have it all seem to be for nothing. And this is why I just want December to go the hell away.


I've really had sooooooo much to smile about this month, too. I really, truly have. And so much of has been because of the incredible friends I have made through blogging. Honestly, I've cried tears of pure joy on more than one occasion this month due to the unbelievably thoughtful, generous, loving words and actions of friends that I'm not sure I even deserve. You all know who you are. And I so hope you all know how very much I love you.

And ZOMG, was I spoiled with gifts! Rich and I had agreed to cut back...but I don't think he listened. ;) (Granted, some of the books came from the library book sale, but still!) And oh my goodness, the lovely gifts I received from heart nearly burst.

Here's a picture of all the goodies that will make my reading life even more delightful:

Not only did I get this amazing stack of books and so much money in gift cards that I feel almost guilty about it, but I got beautiful bookmarks, some of them handmade, tea and chocolate to savor as I read, the most beautiful and comfy handmade slippers imaginable, and the most special handmade Calpurnia doll that this world has ever seen.

This is far more spoilage than any one person needs, I know. And yet, I received even more...some crafty supplies, office supplies, and a gorgeous framed photo that I fell in love with the first time I saw it (from the talented photographer herself).

You know, bottom line, as cranky and ugly as I've felt much of this month, I was inundated in love. And thus, my new year's resolution, a few days early:

Make every day a good day! (Okay, so I totally stole this from was her New Year's resolution back when she was four years old. Smart kid!) Treasure the little things (and the big things) that make life so beautiful. Remember that the not-so-good stuff is a part of life (and truly it's an important part in helping me see how honestly blessed I am). Never miss an opportunity to say, "I love you," and never miss an opportunity to show it through actions. Be appreciative. Live.


  1. Sending flu-banishing power your way. :( I'm so sorry December has been messed up like that. And god I know exactly how it feels for an illness to pass from one the the the next..yeah. It's miserable. And exhausting. And in the winter, you can't open up the windows and clear out the sick air. (Well, you can in Texas, you can't open them in the summer, though, which is when we tend to get sick, so I DO know.)

    But I'm glad you had such wonderful, special gifts to try to counter things. Merry Christmas, Debi. :)

  2. Aw Debi, I really hope poor Rich gets well soon! And also that you feel completely well. But I'm glad there were also things that made you smile, and that you felt as loved as you are :)

    ...and wow, just look at that loot! :D

  3. Ohhhhh so sorry to hear that Rich is now sick!.. and sorry to hear how long its' been hanging on to you too! (and I feel a sore throat coming on and hope it turns out to be nothing!)..
    You did have a dang good haul there lady! lol But then we who like books are so easily made happy! lol

    I don't do New years stuff so for me the holidays are done!! I used to do all the work you did but now I do none! but I am still glad it's over!
    I sent an email letting you know what I got!!

    Feel better Debi.. Rich too.. the flu scares me anymore.

  4. I might have the same reasoning, but I found December a bit overwhelming this year myself. I will be glad when it is over with! I am glad you have some good points, though, and I hope that 2010 starts off a bit better than 2009 ended. Happy Holidays to you!

  5. YOu are not on your own with a dreary December. We have had to cancel so many different things over the last week due to illness. I am hoping we can keep to the rest of our social gatherings through the next week.

    Looks like you had a fabulous Christmas present wise,so I am glad that cheered you up.

  6. I haven't had the same love for December as usual this year either... huh. Here's hoping everyone is healthy, that we live each day with the idea to make it great and January is... better? :) Have a blessed 2010.

  7. Oh Debi :( I had no idea how wacky the holidays went :( I'm sorry my dear. It sounds like you still managed to have a nice Christmas though. Life can be so unpredictable at times, can't it? I sure hope Rich feels better soon! And God knows I hope that damn flu gets the hell out of your system for good soon!!!

    On the good side, I'm totally in love with your Christmas loot :D Looks like you really did have a fantastic one! And your new years goals are absolutely perfect. You know I actually wrote down those last couple of sentences that you wrote. They're something that makes so much sense. So simple, yet so hard to do sometimes, huh? I need to start noticing the little things. There are so many of them. Love you Debi!

  8. Ms Debi - I'm sorry you had a difficult Christmas. I know the feeling - for me, like if you can only work hard enough, then somehow or other, you'll be able to make it so everything is good and everyone can be happy. Of course, in real life, you know that won't work, but life goes and does an extra job of proving you wrong, anyway, just for good measure. Sorry, and I hope everyone is better, now. :/

  9. Ack! I totally blanked on telling you that I know Scott Schwartz! .. he's played Flick in Christmas Story.. the kid who's tongue gets stuck to the pole! lol I never miss watching that movie because of him lol.. but the worst part is I remember "red rider"!!! ok I am going to be sick now lol

  10. December has been less festive than usual here, too, though at least we have escaped the flu ... so far. At least Rich got sick right before everyone was due to arrive and not right after. A bit of a bright side there. I, too, have hopes for the new year that I hope are not too high. We shall see. On my list of things to do today or tomorrow is pen a proper thank you to you and yours for the wonderful gifts. I love them all! I hope Rich is feeling better by now and that your cranky chest is getting back to normal. Lingering crud is the absolute pits. Hang in there!!!

  11. Oh man, that just sucks! I am so sorry you were all sick over the holidays. No amount of Christmas spirit can make that any more pleasant. Oh you dears, I feel so bad. Wish I could have injected some chicken soup and love right into your veins and made you all better for Santa!

    Although it sounds like Santa, in the form of Rich, was pretty darn good to you! Are we gonna get a book pornish post sometime in the future? Some of us do like to lust, you know! :)

    I certainly hope the new year starts off much better and I think the advice about each day is perfect. It is simple and yet sometimes too hard to do if we don't make it a priority.

    Not a whining post at all, just one of honesty, and I appreciate it.

  12. You know that you can always whine and let it all out here because we love ya and support you!!! That would be enough to make me fall on the floor, curl up in a ball, and suck my thumb!!!!! LOL!! I hope that everyone is on the path to being healthy!! Things happen and we just have to learn to roll with it otherwise it can really make us sick emotionally. I know that all too well with the problems I have been having with my 18 yo son and how he has treated me over the past few months. I absolutely LOVE the idea of putting into words the GOOD helps doesn't it???